Archive for November, 2005

Anger Management


After an entire month to start off my second year of German studies, it dawned on me that my new teacher has serious anger management issues. This is true to the point where the students are afraid to come up to her and ask her questions, rounding up the students like a boot-camp commander. I’m at status-quo with her as long as I get my homework done and don’t ask any “stupid” questions or say anything dumb (“Entschuldig mir, aber Ich habe nicht verstanden”).

Thursday was my day off which I took advantage of in order to get my shit settled at the bank. In an interesting turn of events, that went rather well. I met Dina in Tel Aviv to get a pair of shoes (I hate shopping, so I have a tendancy to wait until they’re completely falling apart until getting new ones) and we shmoozied on along to Mike’s Place for Thanksgiving dinner. The dinner was absolutely marvelous, I haven’t celebrated Thanksgiving since, oh, 1989. The chefs did a wonderful job with the Turkey and I retired home happily to do my homeword for said insane teacher.

Alot of people have been asking me where my podcast is. Answer – it’s on the way, but it won’t arrive next week. I’ve been having a few crazy weeks lately, most of which have affected my mood severely. The quick (and more interesting) answer is, that I haven’t been podcasting because I’ve been out drowning myself in alcohol. The longer answer is, that I’ve actually been working on some projects that have left me no time for anything else, AND have been drowning myself in alcohol. There’s actually more to it than that – but I’ll have to leave you in the dark about it. Sorry. All I can volunteer for now is that I’ll try to be back on the “air” as soon as I humanly can.

Where’s the beef?


My brother is finally back from being shipped out to the Cretian Islands. The Israeli Navy shipped them out for a week for some sort of conference, so the kids took the “Sa’ar 5″ missle ship and off they went. The military granted each of them with about  100eu to spend, and he came back with a Tshirt that said “Go wild, the army’s paying” on the the back, with a drawing of a stripper. Hmm.

Friday morning was the first day of my third semester of “German School” at the Goethe Institute, which shook me up a little. I had grown used to having easy Fridays off for a few months, and not only was this a culture shock (as stepping into the institute always is), but this time around we actually had a change of teacher. One of the most obvious differences between our previous teacher and our new one, is that our new teacher tries to put more weight on speaking and proper pronounciation.

As a first assignment, we were asked to get up out of our chairs and pick another student at random. We were asked to ask him/her questions about his/her life, and later we returned to our tables where the teacher went up to each of us and asked us to elaborate upon the life of the person we spoke to. The girl who spoke to me, apparently, was either asleep, couldn’t understand my German, or was drunk.

Teacher: “Who did you speak to?”
Girl: “I spoke to Liron.”
Teacher: “And what did you find out about Liron?”
Girl: “She said that she was born in America”
Me: (whispering) “I didn’t say that.”
Girl: “Oh.”
Teacher: “What else did you find out about Liron?”
Girl: “Sie sagt, sie liebt in Israel.”
*Liron cringes*
Teacher: (writing this on the whiteboard) “This sentence is technically correct, but what you meant to say was “sie LEBT in Israel”, which means “she is living in Israel”. What you said, and I hope this is true for her, is “She is having sex in Israel” “
*entire class bursts out laughing*
Me: “You better believe it, I’ll take that as a compliment”

So, the entire class keeps on laughing for about 10 minutes, during which I just sit there, nodding my head, with a “damn straight, peeps” look on my face.

Unglaublich.

Halloween 2005 celebrated at Mike’s Place, Tel Aviv.


Liron and Vincent outside Mike's Vincent, outside MIke's Danielle and Kuti, outside of Mike's Danielle and Kuti, outside of Mike's Frankie and Whatsherface, outside of MIke's Tom, the leafblower Dave as Arthur Dent and Tom the Leafblower Tom, the leafblower and Josh as Lenny Kravitz (?) Dave as Arthur Dent and Tom the Leafblower Liron and Dave as Arthur Dent Tom the Leafblower and Liron Glen, the slashed biker from hell (?) Liron and Frankie Liron and Frankie Josh with the best costume of the evening. Tony and Gibbs Liat and Yoash the B-Movie Bartender Yokozuna Costume contest Natalie as The Vigin Mary Shaman Shaman My Halloween makeup, woo.
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